Since we don't have a humor forum and this time of year this applies. Sometimes in life we laugh because it's funny. Other times in life because it's true.
Christmas shopping for woman, a man's perspective.
"Hi, my name is Grand and I'm coming before you this day to confess to a great problem I have. Much like most other men in this world, I utterly fail at shopping for the lady in my life..."
Is there anything quite in this world, and I mean anything more infuriating, more mentally draining, more challenging and more hated than shopping for a woman?!?!?! So many styles, so many colors (how do they just create new names for colors that already exist? I.E. off white or light gray becomes "natural heather"). This is the time of year we are most vulnerable to making special trips in nifty white jackets while hugging ourselves to the asylum. This is the time of year we contemplate arson as opposed to shopping. This is the time of year we men go slightly insane trying to figure out the subtle clues dropped by the most prized part of our life, our ladies. And this is the time of year all men are utterly clueless and without hope.
GARRRRRR!!!!!!!! So I figured "easy this year, I'm doing my shopping online and shouldn't have a problem." But I was way in over my head. I don't speak the language, I am not up on the styles, and I'm certainly not a good judge of women's clothing. I feel like I have just taken a mission to Mars and am attempting to identify alien artifacts and what purpose they serve. And I am probably not unlike most males in this regard.
So we fish for ideas and more often than not, it turns into the MENSA version of Trivial Pursuit as we try to figure out what she likes. "Hey sweetie, that looks nice...bet you might like something like that and look nice in it"
Followed with "meh..." which immediately translates to "No, not really, you are horrible at picking out your own clothing, much less mine." Okay, got that minor tidbit of womanspeak down. But does it have to be harder than quantum physics to figure out?
Besides the fact women are utterly complicated and have a language all their own that we simple men do not understand, we now are forced to browse through the women
Christmas shopping for woman, a man's perspective.
"Hi, my name is Grand and I'm coming before you this day to confess to a great problem I have. Much like most other men in this world, I utterly fail at shopping for the lady in my life..."
Is there anything quite in this world, and I mean anything more infuriating, more mentally draining, more challenging and more hated than shopping for a woman?!?!?! So many styles, so many colors (how do they just create new names for colors that already exist? I.E. off white or light gray becomes "natural heather"). This is the time of year we are most vulnerable to making special trips in nifty white jackets while hugging ourselves to the asylum. This is the time of year we contemplate arson as opposed to shopping. This is the time of year we men go slightly insane trying to figure out the subtle clues dropped by the most prized part of our life, our ladies. And this is the time of year all men are utterly clueless and without hope.
GARRRRRR!!!!!!!! So I figured "easy this year, I'm doing my shopping online and shouldn't have a problem." But I was way in over my head. I don't speak the language, I am not up on the styles, and I'm certainly not a good judge of women's clothing. I feel like I have just taken a mission to Mars and am attempting to identify alien artifacts and what purpose they serve. And I am probably not unlike most males in this regard.
So we fish for ideas and more often than not, it turns into the MENSA version of Trivial Pursuit as we try to figure out what she likes. "Hey sweetie, that looks nice...bet you might like something like that and look nice in it"
Followed with "meh..." which immediately translates to "No, not really, you are horrible at picking out your own clothing, much less mine." Okay, got that minor tidbit of womanspeak down. But does it have to be harder than quantum physics to figure out?
Besides the fact women are utterly complicated and have a language all their own that we simple men do not understand, we now are forced to browse through the women
Comment