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You never know where someone is "at"

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  • You never know where someone is "at"

    I tell this story to tie in to someone I have talked about a lot in regards to how your attitude is now in purchasing transactions and how that could play out post SHTF in a barter situation.

    You never know at first glance where someone is "at" when you first deal with them.

    Some have noticed and some know that I've been sporadic posting the last couple weeks. We've been helping with two medical emergencies involving extended family and friends.

    So we are in "the big city" shuttling people to hospitals in various forms of injury- nothing minor and nothing easy.

    Both are ambulatory but barely.... So we pull up to get them and via lack of sleep I leave car door open on my side while I walk around to assist. Big parking lot, plenty of options for going around, backing up, etc. I screwed up leaving the door open- yes without a doubt. This was not to be nor was a 5 minute episode, but it did take approximately a minute to get them in.

    Guy pulls up and drop his wife off who is perfectly mobile, moving fine, etc. She says passing by- "shut that car door" and keeps moving. We glance her way, think a few choice words and keep assisting the others.

    Not 10 seconds later the guy in the car that dropped off the women lays on his horn, holding it down for approximately 5 seconds. I wave my hand to him, shake my head and point towards the person we are assisting who is by this time 95% in the car.

    Guy lays on his horn again, longer. That breeched my wife's breaking point.

    Now for those that have met her at campouts, etc. they know her as a nice, quiet, helpful and definitely not very dominant gal. So this sort of behavior is NOT normal for her.

    I heard "I BEG YOUR PARDON!" And saw her walking towards his car.

    Oh boy... It's on now.

    Mentally and physically exhausted, stressed past the breaking point, she exhibited behavior unlike her normal behavior. While she never touched him or his vehicle, I did have to intercede. I have no doubt she would have definitely changed his attitude.... However that was not the best move at that particular junction.

    I have talked before on the podcast and here that you really won't know where people are "at" mentally when trying to deal with them in a SHTF situation.

    The idea to barter to make a profit seems less and less "profitable" when you consider things like this.

    The person you are dealing with might have just lost a family member, they might have "nothing to lose" and when you reject a deal they offered you, it might be easier for them to shoot you in the face than to "haggle" or "dicker" with you for something they really need.

    Also, the other major point is KNOWING YOUR CREW. That doesn't just mean "oh their is Bob, and Tim, and Tyrone..." That means knowing how people deal with stress- REAL STRESS. You can induce SOME of this in training. Just understand that someone will deal easier with someone shooting at them, than later having to live without a family member.

    How do we overcome this? Being able to "read" people and survey the scene. Avoid all, BE FLEXIBLE- a reoccurent theme in what I preach if you noticed ;)

    Most of all, we want to avoid having to barter with someone that's on that level. Everyone wants to talk about "barter items" and dreams of having little "stores" set up and stuff like that. The reality of the situation is going to be much different.

    Robert
    Boris- "He's famous, has picture on three dollar bill!"

    Rocky- "Wow! I've never even seen a three dollar bill!"

    Boris- "Is it my fault you're poor?"

  • #2
    I think if we just practiced that in our everyday normal lives the world would be a much better place. You never really know what someone is dealing with.

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    • #3
      Just some thoughts here but 1 ADmin is right how many times have we lost our" kool " When times are normal?? Me ,quite a few....So on the subject of barter, If someone barters ,to borrow a phrase "In the New Normal"times you need to set up a 90 degree barter secuirty table. The transaction side of the table will be just a 8 foot folding table, the security side will project out 90 deg forward and be made from heaver wood with a few layers of sandbags along the top with one of your trusted help behind the bags that will be armed with a good Shotgun,AR,AK, you pick your flavor...The offended party will think long and hard about how they will act when they have an heavly armed someone behind a barrier on their nine o clock

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      • #4
        The spouse always throws in an interesting twist. I'm usually the one on edge but thats where i live. Good story, good thoughts, hope all is getting better your direction
        Knowledge is Power, Practiced Knowledge is Strength, Tested Knowledge is Confidence

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        • #5
          Let's take this one step further. Years ago on another Fire Dept I was working for, one of our newer medics took his own life due to the stresses of the job. The kid was only 23 and no one ever told him we can't save everybody.

          The day after we buried him I was working at my second job when a co-worker made a flippant ignorant dark humored joke about the situation. I lost it and it took three male co-workers to keep me from attacking the Female(!) who made the joke.

          Normally I would NEVER even think of hitting a woman but suddenly it was too much and I was striking out before I ever knew what was happening.

          The point is, not only may you not know where someone else is "at", You may not even realize how over the edge you are yourself. I spent the whole episode taking care of everyone else but never looked in the mirror. Don't forget to do that.

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          • #6
            Amen to that. "Therapy" and rest for me has been normal fight training, running and some extra rolling around with the boy at the house. Got the time to loose a 100 rounds out of the Glocks this afternoon. I can't remember the last time I went shooting and only shot 100 rounds. Time is short but we can still make time...
            www.homesteadingandsurvival.com

            www.survivalreportpodcast.com

            "Don't be too proud of this technological terror you've constructed..."

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            • #7
              Originally posted by Fido View Post
              The point is, not only may you not know where someone else is "at", You may not even realize how over the edge you are yourself. I spent the whole episode taking care of everyone else but never looked in the mirror. Don't forget to do that.
              I work in a very high stress environment and have seen some of the coolest,most level headed coworkers lose track of their own stress levels, and have done so myself. This can lead to potentially deadly consequences for us during "normal" times. It is important to recognize the stress indicators in our family/group/etc... and to ensure they are keep an eye on ours as well.

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              • #8
                a little related.
                i bought a house last year.
                the guy wanted more money that i had (and more than i wanted to pay)
                he had his heart and soul in the house and yard.
                he'd planned to live there the rest of his life.
                he'd carefully added a couple of features to the place.
                --
                he was a nice polite man. his wife was gracious.
                3 years ago i made an offer he thought was ridiculous.
                i thought it was high.
                he suddenly got real upset and loud shouting at the real est. agent.
                3 years later (mid 2011)
                we bought it for a little above my original price.
                and he again had several screaming sessions with the realtors.
                --
                the problem for him was. no one else ever offered him anything.
                yes. my offer was low.
                but it was way above everyone who looked and drove off.
                --
                if i've got the only catfish in the county and my price is 10 gallons of gas for 2 catfish.
                and you haven't had meat in a month.
                the catfish may be worth 10 gallons of gas!

                great thread.

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by Lowdown3 View Post
                  Amen to that. "Therapy" and rest for me has been normal fight training, running and some extra rolling around with the boy at the house. Got the time to loose a 100 rounds out of the Glocks this afternoon. I can't remember the last time I went shooting and only shot 100 rounds. Time is short but we can still make time...
                  Thats whats wrong with the middle east, they dont fish, thats why they are so mad:)
                  Knowledge is Power, Practiced Knowledge is Strength, Tested Knowledge is Confidence

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                  • #10
                    I have been in a pickle like this running my mouth and got popped in my mouth. Very humbling experience.
                    You know what ol' Jack Burton always says at a time like this?

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                    • #11
                      haha DH says menopause meds better be at the top of my prepping list for this exact reason! LOL!

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by WiseOwl View Post
                        I have been in a pickle like this running my mouth and got popped in my mouth. Very humbling experience.

                        That will happen to that fellow, I have no doubt whatsoever about that. Had I not been playing nursemaid, it would have likely been via me or the Kat.

                        We talked about this again last night, the wife said "you know that guy probably looked, saw a younger couple helping some old people, clean cut and figured we were o.k. to screw with." Meaning if we were decked out in the gangsta lean on 24's with pants saging down he probably wouldn't have honked the horn. I said "you never know about people. We looked "tame" but that's not exactly the case."
                        www.homesteadingandsurvival.com

                        www.survivalreportpodcast.com

                        "Don't be too proud of this technological terror you've constructed..."

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          When the world is crashing around me, I usually continue to think and analyses the situation and most often take life saving action. The small things don't upset me, it's the middle of the road stuff that sends me over the edge.

                          My husband, myself , my nephew and 3 dogs were boating when we ran out of gas. We called sea rescue and waited and waited and waited. It was unbelievably hot and the few cans of soft drinks we'd taken were gone. I was not in a good mood. Finally two fisherman approached us and offered a tow to the shore. We accepted. As we were being towed we realized the two were drunk. I mean drunk. I'd heard their speech but thought they were just 'good ol' boys', but didn't realize it was alcohol not local dialect. They started saying sexually nasty things about women, and as things went from bad to worse, I absolutely lost it.

                          In another occasion, a man behind me in the supermarket was buying a case of beer, it was early evening 7 or so and i'd just gotten off from work. As the cashier was scanning my items, the jerk said (paraphase) 'he didn't know why women went to grocery store at night. Especially when working men were getting off work. He got nastier. Which of course make me so angry, I slowed down paying my bill and leaving. I went to my car, and watched him leave the grocery store, after he got into his truck, I pulled behind so he couldn't leave. I have no idea what possessed me. However, when I noticed the gun rack on the back window, I decided to go home.

                          The people that push my buttons are BULLYS. Both of these situations were dangerous, but my temper overruled my good sense. In my mind nothing is worse than a BULLY. My rational mind tells me that to have become aggressive during either event was dangerous. I did it anyway. I'd like to say I'm older and wiser, but I know a bully can still make me see red.

                          Sounds like Lowdown's wife doesn't like Bullies either.

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                          • #14
                            Significant stress can/will cause all of us to do strange things. If you have never been in a really stressful situation, you really don't know how you will handle it. Post PAW we will have many stressors, and then add in lack of sleep. That is why elite trained forces go through evaluations to include stress without sleep to see where their breaking point really is.
                            Protecting the sheep from the wolves that want them, their family, their money and full control of our Country!

                            Guns and gear are cool, but bandages stop the bleeding!

                            ATTENTION: No trees or animals were harmed in any way in the sending of this message, but a large number of electrons were really ticked off!

                            NO 10-289!

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